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Yesterday this little rascal surprised me! I wasn’t expecting her until Friday. Needless to say, I wept the happiest of tears and then we ate Mexican food & lived happily ever after again! #bestLaborDayEVER ||  Big props to @rayleneshines for actually pulling off the surprise!

Yesterday this little rascal surprised me! I wasn’t expecting her until Friday. Needless to say, I wept the happiest of tears and then we ate Mexican food & lived happily ever after again! #bestLaborDayEVER || Big props to @rayleneshines for actually pulling off the surprise!

08:36 am: ambigious

quote
Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life.
Robin Sharma
12:58 pm: ambigious

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let your soul & spirit fly into the mystic

I called my mom last night on my way home from a late night at work. I often call her on these drives because it’s a nice way to catch up while also weaving through LA traffic. For the past few weeks I’ have been thinking about a lot about if what I’m doing with my life is what I should be doing with my life. I ran into this problem when I worked in a talent agency for two years after college. I also was confronted with it again when I lived in Portland and had to settle for a desk job after losing my job in film production. And here I am again. 

In high school, I was the girl who wanted to do everything and be friends with everyone. I got the most pleasure out of overexerting myself in endless activities. I got a job when I turned 15 and held one through the end of high school. On top of that I was the Co-Editor-in-Chief of the school newspaper, sang in a band, had a boyfriend, was the lead in the high school musical, played lacrosse and soccer all while maintaining a relatively good GPA. I don’t mention all this to brag. I mention this because this is when I was at my best. All my fires were burning and I was constantly tapped into my creative side. I was able to excel having my day jam-packed with activities.  I work best with chaos. I always have.

I miss this. I miss being pulled in a lot of directions. I miss being able to express myself creatively. I miss being too tired at the end of the day to waste it watching some trashy reality TV show. I miss feeling like I have a purpose each day. 

I’m struggling with this big time and last night was the first time in a long time that I admitted I feel like I’m wasting my strengths. I don’t want to wake up in five years and wish that I had been braver with my ambitions. The next step is figuring out how exactly I move forward from here. Do I find people to make music with? Do I take art classes? Do I start forcing myself to write again more? Do I play rec soccer during the week? What am I missing? 

Living in Los Angeles can be a blessing and a curse. Today it feels like a blessing because I live in a city where the world is my oyster and it’s hard to dismiss this fact. I’m ready to let that light shine through again. I’m ready, ready, ready. 

12:15 pm: ambigious2 notes

quote
Never look back unless you are planning to go that way.
Henry David Thoreau 
10:17 am: ambigious

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💥  (at The Holloway)

💥 (at The Holloway)

04:31 pm: ambigious

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I want to share your mouthful

I wanna do all the things your lungs do so well

∆ (Alt-J)

06:33 pm: ambigious1 note

05:27 pm: ambigious1,024 notes

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<3

(Source: spideys, via onsomenextlevel)

10:38 pm: ambigious411,007 notes

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back o’er oregon

like to call it no big deal

but we both know i’d be lying

i can never come back if i don’t go

10:20 pm: ambigious1 note

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Happy, Happy Monday my friends! Stay gold &amp; bright⚡️✨

Happy, Happy Monday my friends! Stay gold & bright⚡️✨

09:44 am: ambigious1 note

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the boys are back in town. a saturday full of flaming margaritas, endless chips & salsa amongst friends is a saturday well spent.

there’s something about cooking that’s always helped bring me some peace.

08:39 pm: ambigious

quote
'cause anyone who has ever sat in lotus for more than a few seconds
knows it takes a hell of a lot more muscle to stay than to go.
Andrea Gibson, from Pole Dancer (via coffeeslut)
05:03 pm: ambigious13 notes

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ryn weaver // promises

new jam i digggg.

03:45 pm: ambigious2 notes

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03:22 pm: ambigious39 notes

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this is everything today & the wisdom within it is for all the days.

12:25 pm: ambigious